I know I have yet to finish my very personal, deep and meaningful, let-me-tell-you-my-story, series of posts about my relationship with food, but today I had a moment that triggered in me a need to share a different sort of deep and meaningful post. Forgive me, I am an intuitive and we need to do twenty-five things at once or we just aren’t able to work effectively. Drives my sister mad. Anyway.
This moment was something that nourished my heart. Here at Thoroughly Nourished Life I focus a lot on nourishing the soul, as well as mind and body. I believe that an important part of nourishing the soul is nourishing the heart. A year ago my heart was run through a mangle (if you do not know what a mangle is, please refer to this diagram). It was my first real love, my first real heart break, and it broke something inside me for a while. Over the past year I have been slowly (sometimes very slowly) putting all the pieces back together, and in the past few weeks everything has just clicked back into place. As per usual, I needed to reflect on the journey that brought me to this point.
Now, I do not profess to be wise enough to provide the answers to the biggest questions we face in our lives. I like to speculate, but I think that all we can know is the answers for ourself in the moment as we come across each question. Sometimes the answers are fleeting, sometimes there are multiple possibilities for one question, and sometimes the only answer is that there is no answer. How long does it take to mend a broken heart? How do you put all the pieces back together? The answers are different for everyone. For me?
- Tears. Cry them all. Don’t try and hold them back because you will only fracture from the inside out. It’s like trying to keep lightning in a jar.
- Get angry. I didn’t really do this one very well. I am more of a self-deprecating, bitterly-ironic anger expressionist. I did get angry at life though. Let the anger come, and then most importantly, let the anger go.
- Do not relive the moments. In other words: do not be like me and my photographic memory. Don’t look at photos/emails/letters/text messages. Just don’t.
- Take care of yourself. Stay active. Eat well. Be with people and sunshine. Drink champagne on a Tuesday. Nourish your life.
- Have a dog. Dogs don’t care if you cry on them and leave tear stains and snot on their fur.
- Let yourself have a winter, but as soon as spring pokes its first buds out of the ground don’t fight the sunshine and warmer days.
- Let go. Of all of it. No more pre-conceived ideas about your old future. You have a future – a new one – and it’s all yours. Stop living in the past. Or mourning the past version of what your future might have been.
- Don’t go hunting. Live life and let the next heart come when it may. Just enjoy being yourself. Utterly and completely you.
Then one spring day you’ll go to the markets, and chat to the cute coffee man who’s been making you a perfect cappuccino every Saturday. You will giggle with your sister and realise that your life didn’t stop a year ago.
It began all over again.